DEVELOPING A CULTURE OF CARE

DEVELOPING A CULTURE OF CARE

"One who says he is directly My devotee is not My devotee. However, one who says he is the devotee of My devotee - he is My devotee."

- Krsna to Arjuna in the Adi-Purana

To join and stay in our movement, apart from understanding the philosophy and being attracted by various features of our movement, people need to see that devotees care for each other and help each other succeed.

People need to see that the devotees are there for each other, that they help each other, that they see the Lord in each other's heart - and on this spiritual basis create a caring, loving community. At that time people can   decide to try associating with us. 

There was a devotee in Dallas who had been coming to the temple for twenty years. When the devotees asked him what kept him from making a firm commitment, he answered: "I have seen how you treat those who first come in contact with you - who are guests. And I have seen how you treat your members. I would rather stay as a guest."

We can learn from this regular guest that we may be good in attracting people but we still need to learn how to care for them nicely and help them grow and develop in Krsna consciousness on an ongoing basis.

Most of us conditioned souls are driven by several essential needs. I would like to mention these four:

1. The need to be loved

2. The need to express love

3. The need for security

4. The need for belonging

There are other needs like the need for food, health, etc. which are to be taken care of, but these needs are usually not so difficult to meet as the above four.

Imagine a person with a big income, well-nourished and healthy and successful in his business - but the above needs are not met.

This person will most probably be so miserable that he will prefer to do anything and everything to obtain these four treasures.

In a  caring  community these needs are taken care of - while an honest attempt is made to provide for all the other needs as well. 

It is a common misunderstanding in spiritual communities to think that taking care of physical needs is material. No, it is Vaisnava seva, just as friendliness, association, and conversation are.

In this connection, there is an old story which makes a very profound point on serving and supporting devotees.

Once upon a time  there was not much visible difference between heaven and hell. They almost looked the same. It so happened that a person who just left his body arrived at the gates to heaven. Petrus opened the gate and asked him: "Where would you like to stay, in heaven or in hell?"

The man was  surprised and asked: "Well, if it is up to me to choose, tell me first what is the difference?"

Petrus said: "I will show you, but we have to wait for the time when the meals are served."

At two o'clock at noon, the lunchtime had come and Petrus took the newcomer to hell. Everything looked nice when they arrived, well kept, a little luxurious - and the temperature was just right. 

They entered a hall with tables. In the middle of each table was a large bowl with spoons. Just then, the hall filled with people who all set around the tables waiting for the sign to start eating. 

When the sign was given, each one took their spoons and began to eat as fast as possible from the bowl in the middle of the table. In the meantime, they cursed each other as being very greedy and leaving nothing for the other people.

Sometimes they even used their elbows. There was an atmosphere of deep anxiety looming in the room - anxiety to not get enough.

Shocked, the newcomer looked at the atmosphere and  said: "If there is no visible difference, I am wondering what heaven looks like." "Wait," said Petrus, "we have to wait for dinner."

At dinner time Petrus and the newly arrived person went to heaven – and straight into the hall for taking meals, which looked exactly the same as the one in hell: there were many tables, each with a bowl of food in the middle.

But what a difference in behavior and atmosphere. The signal to start the meal was a mutual prayer. And how was their eating? You should have been there to see it. 

Each one of the people who set around the table smilingly took their spoon and fed their neighbors and sometimes also the person on the opposite side. There was an atmosphere of love pervading everything.

Pleasant laughter was heard, praises of each other and also narrations about the Supreme Lord. 

The newcomer had understood: heaven was a place of selflessness whereas hell was a place of selfishness. 

Heaven was a community of care and hell a community of struggle for survival.

Creating a Caring Community

If we want to create a caring community we have to start with the right type of understanding. 

Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura's wrote that in order to create the inspiration to care for others, one needs to go through three steps:

1. Understand the true equality of all living beings

2. Understand the nature of misery

3. Be determined to eradicate misery by undertaking concrete remedial meas

This personal understanding is the beginning, but it is not enough. One must alao create opportunities and a systems so that our desires to care for others can be fulfilled. 

In other words, it is not enough to only want to help the sick. You must build a hospital (or some other way of help) where our desires to care can become translated into the practical dimension.

As a new missionary movement full of young people our movement was primarily focused on expanding its preaching facilities like temples, books and food distribution, various programs, etc. We were clearly project-oriented and the people who joined were expected to serve these projects.

This did not work in the long run, because many people whose needs were not fulfilled left. Therefore, if we want people to stay and more new people to come we need to develop a community which is people-oriented.

How can devotees  be taken care of in such a community?

We can create a caring system like counselor or mentoring system or bhakti sanga groups. Then there may be various forums of care like old people care, young people care, schools and hospitals, etc. Also we can have a team  which helps devotees to find their marriage partners, and a team that supports the brahmacaris, etc. We can also have various spiritual guides and life coaches.

In other words, there are not only good intentions but also  forums in which the practical care is done.

More and more devotees understand that caring for Krsna's devotees and for people in general is itself a very important spiritual practice. In fact, it is essential. 

In the Srimad Bhagavatam it is a said: 

"The self-effulgent Vaikuṇṭha planets, by whose illumination alone all the illuminating planets within this material world give off reflected light, cannot be reached by those who are not merciful to other living entities. Only persons who constantly engage in welfare activities for other living entities can reach the Vaikuṇṭha planets."

SB 4.12.36

Here we  would like to encourage devotees to start caring for others in one way or the other, according to their inclination.

How can one person take care of the needs of others? Perhaps you may feel that you are already at your limits with all your duties and challenges.

Let us start to think deeply about developing a caring community. Otherwise, devotees  might feel neglected and leave and look for such a community elsewhere.

Many devotees have already left Krsna consciousness, because they feel physically, emotionally, socially and even spiritually starved. All these needs could have been taken care of by the a community which cultivates a culture of care. 

Let us discuss and make plans how to develop it, so we can help each and every devotee succeed in all areas of life.